Another boring day~

Haiz~ save me from my boring job... sometimes i really love this job because of the job scope.. sometimes i just simply hate it.... It will makes me real bored when there is really nothing to do.. And it keeps me busy when its really busy... shit! can't we have anything that is evenly spread?? haiz~ i skyoed him yesterday.. was quite surprise that he replied to my message.. i thought that he will ignore me.. buahaha!!! well.. i am petty doesn't mean that he is.. He did not know that his colleague had actually told me bout him recently... i asked him for red packets.. just for fun.. acted ignorant... I admit i still think of him.. lucky i don't dream of him anymore... when i talk bout him with 二姐 she will still scold me for being so stupid.. buahaha.. ya.. i failed in certain things... to 二姐 i failed in cheating him finanacially since i can't get his love... buahaha... hmm.. well.. i can't say that he did not spend on me.. in fact he did.. hmm... may not be as much as he is willing to for D.... yesh.. ask for a failed "M".. I was one... I once told myself that i wont hate him.. but i was wrong.. when i was skyping him yesterday.. part of me is rejecting to receive more news bout him.. haiz... no!!!!!! i can't be so petty!!!!!!! He don't belong to me in the first place.. and our relationship ended so long ago.. few more months to one year... I have to forget bout him... forget.. forget.. forget..

New Skin Again!!!

Buahah!! was really bored in office... guess i am really so bored to change my skin in office again... hows this new skin? is abit suicidal i think.. at least it gave me this kinda feelings.. hmm... not that i am trying to recover from a broken heart.. just that hmm... i just like the layout and the whole of this blog... how is it?

Adding on.. i found one poem at jie jie's blog.. like this poem alot.. used to be my reply to SL for his question to keep me forever.. ok.. i shall stop here... dun wanna think about him.. or even link my surroundings with him...

it's fate which brought us together.. it's fate which made us friends... 3hundred 6ty 5 days... 8thousand 7hundred 6ty hours... 5hundred 25thousand 6hundred minutes... 315hundred 36thousand seconds... every day ; every hour; every minute ; every second... i'm thinking of you & i am yours forever

Back to good mood!!!

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! back to good mood... the shopping trip plus carrot's company had swept my bad mood away.. Thanks carrot!!!!!!!!! Took some real great photos with carrot today... look damn nice!! i meant the both of us look damn nice in the photos... (msg to qiuyi: dun get jealous.. you are at M'sia..) buahaha!!! poor carrot.. she gotta shop half of Orchard with me because i was considering whether to buy the jeans from Levis... buahaha!! In the end.. i bought it... wahaha!!! Wore an overall dress out today.. and was telling carrot about my plan to change my dressing... buahaha!! told her i should dress to show my character.. and i told her my shorts with suspender... wahaha!!! that's cool man!! really like my new style... was sooo.. tempted to buy shoe.. but cant... coz its cny.... hmm.. only had a meal today... and that's dinner.. wahaha!! woke up at 11 plus when carrot smsed me.. and lazy me only managed to leave my bed after 12... when i reached town it was around 4pm... was so hungry... so.. carrot accompany me to Paragon for an early dinner.. buahaha!! coz her cow cant walk when she is hungry.... buahaha.. leg is so painful now.. really wonder why... its like i had sprained my leg... guess is some old injury thingy... cant even walk properly now... haiz... Bai Hui is leaving tomorrow.. will really miss her...

The CNY mood

It is CNY and i cant even remove my bad mood totally... This year is really different... my 2nd sis was not able to join us for the reunion dinner and we can't gamble late at night in my room... Really miss her after she moved... come to think of that alot of unhappy things had happened to me after she moved out... maybe i shall ask her to move back and my luck will return.. wahahaha!!!

Recently i had been hearing those stories of "seriously hurt and dun dare to fall in love" stories from my frenz... Hmm.. guess that's something that will happen to everyone.. maybe its just a phase... came to realise that the term "seriously hurt" can be interpreted as "why would you fall for someone else?"... at least to me i feel that.. I had not been able to forget alot of things because i knew too much thngs... really feel like losing this part of the memory so that i won't link to much of my surroundings with whoever concerns.. Oh no... this is the same question i asked qiuyi then... but now.. its not hurting.. its kinda jealousy... qin shi said that my jealousy only proof that i felt inferior... Fact is i do feel that way.. and i am blaming myself for being too stupid...

CNY

I lurve CNY!!!!!!!!! Not because of the red packets.. because of the fun the family can have!!! Buahaha... gambled the whole day yesterday... and was shouting and talking so loudly he whole day i thought i am gonna lose my voice.... But i still lose money yesterday (Thanks to the unlucky mouth who said i will lose this year)... Really had a great fun time...

I discovered that i was behaving like a kid in front of mummy.. I will tell her what i want like a kid and mummy have to answer to all my questions... buahahaha!!! even yesterday.. she was talking to the cousins and aunties about the childrens' symptoms... like the behaviour of the first kid, second and the youngest child... ya.. i am the youngest in the family... poor me... always have to be the maid of the family... and what mummy said.. the youngest child's favorite question "why not jie jie?" buahahah!!! Haiz... now i am just like a 5 year old in a 21 year old body... I want mummy!!!!! buahahha!!!

Happy New Year to whoever reading this blog now!!!! This is the piggy year!!!! Actually its just another new year to me... buahaha!!! Mood had not recovered from the serious bad mood previously.. reached home around 5am this morning and slept at 5.30am.. was super tired because i have to wake up at 10.30am to bathe and go my god ma house.. One thing about the genes of our family.. we are all very very very straight forward... god ma bought me a bag... mummy discovered that the bag cost $22.. no wonder she told me that the bag is ex.. but.. she never realise that i am no longer the 5 year old kid.. The bag dun suit me and i told her that i dun use this kinda bag... guess that hurts her.. haiz.. no choice...

ya.. if you ever wonder why did i sleep soooooo late.. its because i was out again yesterday night... suppose to accompany Jason to shop for his new year clothes... but in the end.. i was the one doing the shopping.. bought a dress for the company dinner.. and fell in love with a dress at GAP.. the dress cost bout $100 and i was thinking of giving it up.. but Jason think i look really nice in that dress and paid for it.. haiz... We watched the mid-night Ghost Rider which ends around 2 plus.. He was quite good.. accompany me to dragonfly coz i was suppose to look for someone at Mono.. stayed there till 4 plus in the morning.. Guess Jason was crazy enough.. he sms me to be his girlfriend.. he knew that i liked somebody.. and my situation was like being poisoned by that person.. yet he still have the courage to ask this question... *clap hands* It came across my mind that why are both of this aquarius so different???

ok.. lets go back to the new year stuff... Forced my sis to buy me the farm bed sheet and quilt cover... buahaha lets take a look at the effect of the quilt cover.. personally.. i lurve it alot!!!! Finally!! I am sleeping in a farm!!!

Haiz.. today is a boring day.... its the big V day and i am alone... buahaha.. going home after work.. coz dun feel like going out.. Jason asked me out today.. but i turned it away coz i really dun feel like walkin on the streets witnessing all lovey dovey.. i will feel jealous... buahahha!!Received a sms this morning at 12 midnight.. i will take it as a mass sms from him.. though i received it 49 secs after midnight... but since i told myself forget about it i will try hard to forget... sad sad sad....

Su an was so cute yesterday at Mac... she said that she is gonna wait until 12 midnight and hold on tight to her phone in case someone asked her out at midnight.. buahaha!! ya.. in the end i got a sms from someone at 12 midnight.. thats very very funny.. Bai hui is going back next week... haiz.. Joanna invited me to her mini casino next tuesday!! yesh!!! she gonna donate money to Gina's foundation!!!! so excited.. realise that there are other happy things rather than to think of those frustrating matters... hmm.. hated this V day but enjoying as new year approaching!!!

New Phone?

Feel like changing my phone recently... was really quite tired of it.. saw nokia N95.. woah.. fell in lurve with it immediatelt.. but i guess that's gonna be a very very expensive one.. N93 is already 1K. this may be around that price.. Feel like changing to Z720 samsung..

Picture taken when i was damn bloody bored at home.. missing whoever... i know qiu yi will definately hate this picture.. coz she hated the one who bought me this soft toy... but i love this soft toy... Ethylyn knew its name... da tou (big head)...

Jaded...

Felt really worn out today... Went ktv until 12 this morning and went to bed at 1 plus... Super tired... This morning came into office after breakfast at 10am... and boss asked me into his room... Really was very nervous.. He told me that he wanted to discuss about bonus with me after lunch.. *fainted.. adredeline increasing... Guess i won't have any mood this lunch.. Keep thinking all the bad bad things like.. what if i don't get as much bonus to cover my recent expenses??? *fainted again* Wish me luck.... I don't wanna die young...

New skin!!!!

Finally changed my blog skin myself!!!!!!!

Hurt....

What a familiar word.... deep down from inside.... The wound opened again... now i understand that it will never heal.. no matter how long it takes... no matter how strong i am... it will continue to prove my weakness... reflected in the cold night and the nearing date when things ends... where the memories are buried... i dreamt of you several times these few nights... I can still recall the ashtray smell from your kisses..... My recent news of you is your step to proceed to a new future that you will never consider when you were with me... you had decided to leave her... and chose the one you told me you have a stronger feeling with...

i maybe hoping that you will be happy... but don't forget that i am also a woman... deep down.. i am still petty and selfish... the only reason which i can convince myself when you left me was because you had never love me at all... i admit that i did curse you two to end.. may not be now... but i do wish to see the ending... i am afraid to see you again... i am afraid that i can't hide the hatred in me... finally.. i can say that... I HATE YOU!!!

Horrible Idiot!

I WANNA SHOP!!!!!!! Haiz... I seriously why this horrible idiot can stop me from shopping... Finally last weekend had past... this is a damn horrible busy experience.. Last weekend was really a very very very very busy one.. lets start from friday.. had a mini celebration of Ken's birthday with the rest of the colleagues.. then, suppose to continue with YX at power house.. but went home instead.. coz she doesn't have the mood... Saturday went for training at customer's place starting from 12... then went home to sleep at 4... woke up at 6 and had my dinner then voom! to Dragonfly at 10... stayed till 3 plus in the morning and Ken sent me home... was super tired slept at 4 plus and woke up at 8 for a movie at 1050... then shop for a bag and a concert at 1530... had dinner after concert and had the urge to shop... But this horrible guy who went for the concert with me stopped me and asked me to shop next week instead!!! OMG!!! how can you stop a girl from shopping!!!!!!!! haiz... but the tired me went home after getting a top from Mphosis.... Slept in the car but was woke up when he purposely made a sharp turn at the NUS exit... bloody hell.. he can still asked me "you are really sleeping?" *fainted* OF COZ I AM!!!! when i reached home and realised that i forgot my keys... he can actually leave me at my door and walked away... OMG!!! He thought i was kidding! *fainted again*

SURRENDER!!!!!!!!!!

I surrender! Give up! I had already stepped out of my circle and move towards you... but the response from you is still the same... I really wonder did i do the right thing... I told him i dun wanna fall for someone who dun like me.. Isn't it very clear that i am telling him i like him? If he have his reserve and doesn't want any commitment than that shall be it... he can tell me straight.. I wont mind.. It is not like we can't be friends any more... Haiz... I really dun understand old man at all... CCL told me maybe he think that i am too young... Carrot told me she think he is not serious... no matter what.. I had surrendered... Put it behind and forget about it...

Hippest place in Singapore

I guess the recent most "in" place to club is the newly opened St. James Powerstation.. well... not really that fantastic after all.... Spent my xmas there last year.. was very fun at Power House... Guess because the crowd there that day was fun... but went there again last friday... not that good as compared to the other time... Had been clubbing non stop since xmas... haiz.... gonna try out the ladies night tomorrow... buahahaa!!! Carrot and Terese were shaking their head after friday... haiz... saddening... I got the membership there... guess that will be my often hangout..

Called carrot on saturday to ask what she wanna tell me on friday night... and after what she told me.. I chose to believe her hunch... She is always very correct.. I guess i really should stay as calm and patient towards alot of things... It sent me into thinking of alot of things... Damn frustrated... dats why went for a haircut after lunching with my family.. grandpa's birthday... Had my nails done also.. with crystals... Think its really time to doll myself up often... I wont stay young forever... As my birthday is nearing... really quite sad because getting old....

This xmas...

Another year had past and its xmas again.... It was the start of our spark last xmas and i had been thinking about it again... Wonder will i hate xmas in future.... Wahaha... Maybe not... This xmas is a normal routine again.. Guess its dinner and countdown.. With Ethly around this year i wonder whether we can play in peace.. I had my Baileys ready for xmas... If the family wont mind... we can have chivas too... Got quite alot of alcohol due to frequet travel...

There was a DND last friday and went to rouge after that... Guess i wont me joining the group if carrot is not around... Guess they are still together huh... Saw them quite close to each other.. And was feeling abit down.... But whatever it is.. I had long wished them their best and its none of my business any more...

Mummy had been cooking the brown rice drink for me again.. Haiz... Guess i made her worried by telling her my health screen blood test result... Think before anything i gotta do the blood test again to confirm the result... Daddy is even funnier.. walk into the room and ask me to eat more chocolates... Guess it wont help... Hmm.. i think there must be something wrong with the blood test... Think i better do it again... Coz there isn't any kinda symptoms in our family... It can't be inherited... Both sisters didn't have it... I can't be so weak anyway... Hahaha!!! Usually naughty people live longer.... Doc also said that i drink too frequently... But i am trying my best to cut down on it....

Guess I gotta brace myself up and welcome the new year..... Merry Xmas n Happy New Year!!

Back from Phuket and working hard...

Went Phuket the week before and was back last week.. Dissertation date is drawing near and i need to get it done.. The whole essay was finally done yesterday and is left with som rubbish to complete the whole thing.. get so tired and is like aza aza fighting.... after dissertation i am left with two more projects.. the compilation of group project and start of my individual project... buahaha.. gonna hug buddha's leg again... :p tired.. let me share some phuket photos here...

Europe Trip

Boo~~~!!! Just return from Austria.... One word to describe the whole trip... GREAT!!!!!!!! Went Villach (company HQ) for training and meeting.. during my weekend, i went Vienna and Venice (Italy)..
Travelled to Vienna myself by train and met Megan (HR Manager) and Crystal (Boss wife) at the train station... woo~!! We stayed over at Megan's boss house which saved alot... I like Vienna.. but not as much as Venice... I did more shopping than sightseeing coz of the time limit.. Travelled with Crystal back to Villach on Saturday...
On Sunday, Adrian and Ming was so kind and good to bring me to Venice!!! They suffered real big loss in the casino the previous day in the casino and slept damn late... Still, they asked me to morning call them and drove me to Venice... Venice was fun!!! But crowded.. Very crowded... Buahaha... ok... let me show some pictures...
My Apartment...
Vienna

This is a REAL pic!

Venice!!!

Villach!

Doesn't matter anymore

QS is back from Aussie!!!! So sweet of her to plan what kinda clothes i can bring to Austria... I was really touched when she showed me one winter wear after another.. teaching me how to wear them!!! Buahaha... Guess i am the most fortunate gal in this world to have such fantastic friend.... I luv her!!!! Buahaha!!
Guess its my PMS again... short tempered.. impatient... and stupid thoughts that will run through my mind... Realized this when i talked to mum this morning... and change back to my normal tone... hehe.. mummy got me breakfast this morning coz i was running late... The lazy me like to sleep alot recently.. Or should i say.. like to sleep late...
Becca dropped me a bomb on saturday night during supper... she said "Bring your bf along for my birthday"... omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where can i find a part time bf??????? She said i dun have to purposely find a bf just for her birthday.. Just bring a partner along.. ok.... If thats the case.. I might just grip any guy from somewhere... Buahaha.. My sis said there's one who is ever prepared to be my bf any time, any where... Omg... Just kill me if i have to bring that guy~
As for my title of this long blog.. well.. it doesn't matter anymore... because.. i am rubbish...

Some updates

Heres some updates bout myself recently... Same old boring life.. Go out on friday and saturday... and had been drinking alot recently... Was chatting wif carrot just now.. Coz i told her i was out with one of my colleague who is a foreigner and hw already had a girlfriend... Actually in fact i will be travelling with him during my trip to Austria... And it had brought much attention to carrot dat i am some how always or frequently attracted to attached guys.. Hmm.. some how its abit true... but i had already draw a line very clear taht i dun wanna mess around wif attached guys...
Another thing that i wanna update is that i am really very excited that i will be flying next saturday... SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!! Finally i am leaving Spore... Finally i had a chance to think over what i really want on the plane.. and alone on a flight to Austria.... Had been thinking on how it will be like to travel alone... yeh!! hehe.. so happy...