Removed from sad list...

Remove me from the sad list.. i am happy now! Now i realise how much money can make a woman happy... buahhaa.. even young woman like me can't deny the fact that the spendings had made my mood good!!! yesh! i am back in good mood from the previous horrible mood swing.. and that lasted so many months... from one cheerful young lady to one grumpy old woman.. buahahah!!! Of coz i have set several goals to make myself lose concentration on the unhappy things... realized how much my degree had cost me... my time.. during the course was so tight that i can't even breathe... mainly also because of the previous job and to cope with all work, family, studies and bf... now i realise that i was so good that i can cope everything during that period.. now.. without school.. i need to look for things to slot into the empty space.. and understand that from the empty space.. i tend to look into alot of sad past and make myself feel so bad... buahaha!! Now with most my empty space filled up with shopping and activities.. I need more sleep!!! think my main activity for this year will really be shopping.. maybe i should start my Masters journey earlier.. hmm... i think i need to go back to CO.. my 二胡 will spoil if i stop playing them... *fainted* ok.. should ask QS if she wanna go back since she promised me after she found a job... but she will be doing her PHD soon!!!!! haiz... darling and dear swore never to return to that place... not that i like that place alot.. even when "someone" will look down on me there.. but that's the place where i can really waste my time for sunday morning... dun think Helen is back also... shit! who will go back with me?? su an?? maybe i should drop this idea also... coz we seemed to be the most "unwelcome" group... of pretty babes! buahaha!!!

Correction

One correction for yesterday post... mummy did not buy the coffee.. daddy did.. one of it is for my BIL... haiz.. but its ok.. at least he brought me coffee.. no wonder he wake me up yesterday which is so not daddy's style to disturb me... went to grab my jeans yesterday at Orchard alone... and don't understand why i wanted to take a look at the phone... in the end i changed it!! i finally bought the new Samsung Z720 (black color)!!!! ok... because of this phone i can't go for holiday... fainted... Was so excited with my new phone that i cant even sleep... haiz... thats why i am so tired today.. walked into office in the morning and all my colleagues called me ang bao.. coz the major color on me is red... haiz... Seng is the worst.. ask me not to eat breakfast with him.. coz he dun want too much attention.. fainted...

Sweet Parents...

Buahaha!! woke up at 1145 this morning... was really damn tired... should have just lockd my door yesterday night... But its ok.. i know that my naughty mummy and daddy were just trying to disturb me from my beauty sleep... buahaha!! the so called punishment for returning home so early in the morning... at least i was earlier than friday or rather saturday morning... hmm... so how should i describe my parents? one huge word.. SWEET!!! I was so so so tired... fell dead on my bed.. and mummy came to my room to wake me up at 8 plus in the morning to remind me to switch off my aircon and wake up earlier to do housework... *fainted* daddy came into my room at 11 am to do the same thing since mummy went out... and to my surprise.. i found 2 packets of "kopi gao" (Thick coffee) hanging in kitchen!! buahaha!!! they must have planned to wake me up early and keep me awake using the coffees.. buahaha!! hmm.. in actual fact i think mummy went for her breakfast and get me my coffee early in the morning.. and daddy got me another one without noticing the one mummy bought... ok.. if you ever wonder how iknow the coffee belongs to me... reason being.. i am the only person who drink thick coffee with milk in this family... and is one REAL coffee addict... ok.. so given the sweet attention... i will definately clean up this dirty house... buahaha!!!! really felt so sweet and was so happy even when i am tired... guess mummy and daddy did the right thing,... coz their precious daughter here had been suffering from insomnia for few weeks and is still struggling to get enough rest... I LOVE YOU!!! MUMMY AND DADDY!!!

Another boring day~

Haiz~ save me from my boring job... sometimes i really love this job because of the job scope.. sometimes i just simply hate it.... It will makes me real bored when there is really nothing to do.. And it keeps me busy when its really busy... shit! can't we have anything that is evenly spread?? haiz~ i skyoed him yesterday.. was quite surprise that he replied to my message.. i thought that he will ignore me.. buahaha!!! well.. i am petty doesn't mean that he is.. He did not know that his colleague had actually told me bout him recently... i asked him for red packets.. just for fun.. acted ignorant... I admit i still think of him.. lucky i don't dream of him anymore... when i talk bout him with 二姐 she will still scold me for being so stupid.. buahaha.. ya.. i failed in certain things... to 二姐 i failed in cheating him finanacially since i can't get his love... buahaha... hmm.. well.. i can't say that he did not spend on me.. in fact he did.. hmm... may not be as much as he is willing to for D.... yesh.. ask for a failed "M".. I was one... I once told myself that i wont hate him.. but i was wrong.. when i was skyping him yesterday.. part of me is rejecting to receive more news bout him.. haiz... no!!!!!! i can't be so petty!!!!!!! He don't belong to me in the first place.. and our relationship ended so long ago.. few more months to one year... I have to forget bout him... forget.. forget.. forget..

New Skin Again!!!

Buahah!! was really bored in office... guess i am really so bored to change my skin in office again... hows this new skin? is abit suicidal i think.. at least it gave me this kinda feelings.. hmm... not that i am trying to recover from a broken heart.. just that hmm... i just like the layout and the whole of this blog... how is it?

Adding on.. i found one poem at jie jie's blog.. like this poem alot.. used to be my reply to SL for his question to keep me forever.. ok.. i shall stop here... dun wanna think about him.. or even link my surroundings with him...

it's fate which brought us together.. it's fate which made us friends... 3hundred 6ty 5 days... 8thousand 7hundred 6ty hours... 5hundred 25thousand 6hundred minutes... 315hundred 36thousand seconds... every day ; every hour; every minute ; every second... i'm thinking of you & i am yours forever

Back to good mood!!!

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! back to good mood... the shopping trip plus carrot's company had swept my bad mood away.. Thanks carrot!!!!!!!!! Took some real great photos with carrot today... look damn nice!! i meant the both of us look damn nice in the photos... (msg to qiuyi: dun get jealous.. you are at M'sia..) buahaha!!! poor carrot.. she gotta shop half of Orchard with me because i was considering whether to buy the jeans from Levis... buahaha!! In the end.. i bought it... wahaha!!! Wore an overall dress out today.. and was telling carrot about my plan to change my dressing... buahaha!! told her i should dress to show my character.. and i told her my shorts with suspender... wahaha!!! that's cool man!! really like my new style... was sooo.. tempted to buy shoe.. but cant... coz its cny.... hmm.. only had a meal today... and that's dinner.. wahaha!! woke up at 11 plus when carrot smsed me.. and lazy me only managed to leave my bed after 12... when i reached town it was around 4pm... was so hungry... so.. carrot accompany me to Paragon for an early dinner.. buahaha!! coz her cow cant walk when she is hungry.... buahaha.. leg is so painful now.. really wonder why... its like i had sprained my leg... guess is some old injury thingy... cant even walk properly now... haiz... Bai Hui is leaving tomorrow.. will really miss her...

The CNY mood

It is CNY and i cant even remove my bad mood totally... This year is really different... my 2nd sis was not able to join us for the reunion dinner and we can't gamble late at night in my room... Really miss her after she moved... come to think of that alot of unhappy things had happened to me after she moved out... maybe i shall ask her to move back and my luck will return.. wahahaha!!!

Recently i had been hearing those stories of "seriously hurt and dun dare to fall in love" stories from my frenz... Hmm.. guess that's something that will happen to everyone.. maybe its just a phase... came to realise that the term "seriously hurt" can be interpreted as "why would you fall for someone else?"... at least to me i feel that.. I had not been able to forget alot of things because i knew too much thngs... really feel like losing this part of the memory so that i won't link to much of my surroundings with whoever concerns.. Oh no... this is the same question i asked qiuyi then... but now.. its not hurting.. its kinda jealousy... qin shi said that my jealousy only proof that i felt inferior... Fact is i do feel that way.. and i am blaming myself for being too stupid...

CNY

I lurve CNY!!!!!!!!! Not because of the red packets.. because of the fun the family can have!!! Buahaha... gambled the whole day yesterday... and was shouting and talking so loudly he whole day i thought i am gonna lose my voice.... But i still lose money yesterday (Thanks to the unlucky mouth who said i will lose this year)... Really had a great fun time...

I discovered that i was behaving like a kid in front of mummy.. I will tell her what i want like a kid and mummy have to answer to all my questions... buahahaha!!! even yesterday.. she was talking to the cousins and aunties about the childrens' symptoms... like the behaviour of the first kid, second and the youngest child... ya.. i am the youngest in the family... poor me... always have to be the maid of the family... and what mummy said.. the youngest child's favorite question "why not jie jie?" buahahah!!! Haiz... now i am just like a 5 year old in a 21 year old body... I want mummy!!!!! buahahha!!!

Happy New Year to whoever reading this blog now!!!! This is the piggy year!!!! Actually its just another new year to me... buahaha!!! Mood had not recovered from the serious bad mood previously.. reached home around 5am this morning and slept at 5.30am.. was super tired because i have to wake up at 10.30am to bathe and go my god ma house.. One thing about the genes of our family.. we are all very very very straight forward... god ma bought me a bag... mummy discovered that the bag cost $22.. no wonder she told me that the bag is ex.. but.. she never realise that i am no longer the 5 year old kid.. The bag dun suit me and i told her that i dun use this kinda bag... guess that hurts her.. haiz.. no choice...

ya.. if you ever wonder why did i sleep soooooo late.. its because i was out again yesterday night... suppose to accompany Jason to shop for his new year clothes... but in the end.. i was the one doing the shopping.. bought a dress for the company dinner.. and fell in love with a dress at GAP.. the dress cost bout $100 and i was thinking of giving it up.. but Jason think i look really nice in that dress and paid for it.. haiz... We watched the mid-night Ghost Rider which ends around 2 plus.. He was quite good.. accompany me to dragonfly coz i was suppose to look for someone at Mono.. stayed there till 4 plus in the morning.. Guess Jason was crazy enough.. he sms me to be his girlfriend.. he knew that i liked somebody.. and my situation was like being poisoned by that person.. yet he still have the courage to ask this question... *clap hands* It came across my mind that why are both of this aquarius so different???

ok.. lets go back to the new year stuff... Forced my sis to buy me the farm bed sheet and quilt cover... buahaha lets take a look at the effect of the quilt cover.. personally.. i lurve it alot!!!! Finally!! I am sleeping in a farm!!!

Haiz.. today is a boring day.... its the big V day and i am alone... buahaha.. going home after work.. coz dun feel like going out.. Jason asked me out today.. but i turned it away coz i really dun feel like walkin on the streets witnessing all lovey dovey.. i will feel jealous... buahahha!!Received a sms this morning at 12 midnight.. i will take it as a mass sms from him.. though i received it 49 secs after midnight... but since i told myself forget about it i will try hard to forget... sad sad sad....

Su an was so cute yesterday at Mac... she said that she is gonna wait until 12 midnight and hold on tight to her phone in case someone asked her out at midnight.. buahaha!! ya.. in the end i got a sms from someone at 12 midnight.. thats very very funny.. Bai hui is going back next week... haiz.. Joanna invited me to her mini casino next tuesday!! yesh!!! she gonna donate money to Gina's foundation!!!! so excited.. realise that there are other happy things rather than to think of those frustrating matters... hmm.. hated this V day but enjoying as new year approaching!!!

New Phone?

Feel like changing my phone recently... was really quite tired of it.. saw nokia N95.. woah.. fell in lurve with it immediatelt.. but i guess that's gonna be a very very expensive one.. N93 is already 1K. this may be around that price.. Feel like changing to Z720 samsung..

Picture taken when i was damn bloody bored at home.. missing whoever... i know qiu yi will definately hate this picture.. coz she hated the one who bought me this soft toy... but i love this soft toy... Ethylyn knew its name... da tou (big head)...

Jaded...

Felt really worn out today... Went ktv until 12 this morning and went to bed at 1 plus... Super tired... This morning came into office after breakfast at 10am... and boss asked me into his room... Really was very nervous.. He told me that he wanted to discuss about bonus with me after lunch.. *fainted.. adredeline increasing... Guess i won't have any mood this lunch.. Keep thinking all the bad bad things like.. what if i don't get as much bonus to cover my recent expenses??? *fainted again* Wish me luck.... I don't wanna die young...

New skin!!!!

Finally changed my blog skin myself!!!!!!!

Hurt....

What a familiar word.... deep down from inside.... The wound opened again... now i understand that it will never heal.. no matter how long it takes... no matter how strong i am... it will continue to prove my weakness... reflected in the cold night and the nearing date when things ends... where the memories are buried... i dreamt of you several times these few nights... I can still recall the ashtray smell from your kisses..... My recent news of you is your step to proceed to a new future that you will never consider when you were with me... you had decided to leave her... and chose the one you told me you have a stronger feeling with...

i maybe hoping that you will be happy... but don't forget that i am also a woman... deep down.. i am still petty and selfish... the only reason which i can convince myself when you left me was because you had never love me at all... i admit that i did curse you two to end.. may not be now... but i do wish to see the ending... i am afraid to see you again... i am afraid that i can't hide the hatred in me... finally.. i can say that... I HATE YOU!!!

Horrible Idiot!

I WANNA SHOP!!!!!!! Haiz... I seriously why this horrible idiot can stop me from shopping... Finally last weekend had past... this is a damn horrible busy experience.. Last weekend was really a very very very very busy one.. lets start from friday.. had a mini celebration of Ken's birthday with the rest of the colleagues.. then, suppose to continue with YX at power house.. but went home instead.. coz she doesn't have the mood... Saturday went for training at customer's place starting from 12... then went home to sleep at 4... woke up at 6 and had my dinner then voom! to Dragonfly at 10... stayed till 3 plus in the morning and Ken sent me home... was super tired slept at 4 plus and woke up at 8 for a movie at 1050... then shop for a bag and a concert at 1530... had dinner after concert and had the urge to shop... But this horrible guy who went for the concert with me stopped me and asked me to shop next week instead!!! OMG!!! how can you stop a girl from shopping!!!!!!!! haiz... but the tired me went home after getting a top from Mphosis.... Slept in the car but was woke up when he purposely made a sharp turn at the NUS exit... bloody hell.. he can still asked me "you are really sleeping?" *fainted* OF COZ I AM!!!! when i reached home and realised that i forgot my keys... he can actually leave me at my door and walked away... OMG!!! He thought i was kidding! *fainted again*